Dr Lori Beth Fire

Do you wish your relationships could be as full of fire as they were when you were younger?  Or was your sex life never as smoking as you wanted it to be?  This month we look at five easy ways to bring back the blaze. If you want a lasting relationship, good sex is essential.

For sexual relationships, imagination provides fuel.  The biggest cause of sexual boredom is not knowing your partner ‘too well’.  The biggest cause is getting stuck in a routine – the same activities in the same place in the same order on the same day and so on.

1 Fires Need Fuel

  1. To provide fuel, start by looking at your favourite fantasies.    Notice the elements that really turn you on.  Is it something about the activity?  Are you doing something with your partner that you don’t do in reality?  Is it something about the environment?  Are you in a place where you might get discovered?  Is there a story being told?  Perhaps you are a pirate and capturing a maiden and holding her for ransom.
  2. Next remember any stellar sexual experiences from your past.  Is there something you want to repeat?  Is there something you can build on?
  3. Have a look at some erotica.  You can watch movies, look at images or bring out that favourite book.  Reading to each other can really increase the heat!
  4. If you are collecting ideas on your own, be sure to make a note of them.  You might put them in order from most exciting to least exciting so you are ready to talk about them with your partner.  If you are collecting them together, pick one or two to talk about in more detail, and keep a note of the others for later discussion.

In order to spice things up, the first step is to find new ideas.  This can be almost as much fun as putting the ideas into action.  There are many places you can look for inspiration.  The only limit is your imagination!

Stay tuned for the next way to bring back that blaze.  Or if you want a plethora of ideas and strategies, join me for the A to Z of Sex workshop, details of the next one can be found below.

Please comment below!

until next time when we will look at creating the space for sex…

Light Your Fire!

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